Have fun with it!
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Looking for more atheist friends?
There's a new fan page (or I guess they're "like" pages now) on Facebook: You're an Atheist? add me & let's be friends!
Have fun with it!
If you enjoyed this post, I hope you'll check out my new blog.
Have fun with it!
Friday, May 7, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Christianity: Not appropriate for children.
There's a Baptist church a few blocks from my house that we drive past pretty frequently. A couple of years ago when my oldest son was first learning his letters, he would point at the cross on the church's sign and say, "T!" Dad and I thought it was cute and let it go at that.
We left the LDS church when this boy was about six months old. His exposure to religion since then has been minimal. I dabbled in Protestant churches off and on for a couple of years after leaving Mormonism and would sometimes take my son with me. He's been to churches for some weddings and funerals of extended family members. That's about it. We haven't "pushed" atheism on him (nor do we intend to), but our son is currently non-religious by default.
Last week, we were driving by aforementioned Baptist church when my son--who turns six next month--asked, "What does the 't' mean?"
"That means it's a church," I said.
"But 'church' starts with 'c-h'." Smart, that kid is.
"Well, the 't' is actually a cross and that means it's a Christian church. That means it's for people who believe in Jesus."
"Jesus died in Fargo?"
I couldn't help giggling at this, but I was also curious. We live in a heavily Christian part of the country and my son has Christian friends. I wondered what he may have heard. "What do you know about Jesus?" I asked.
"Nothing," he replied. (Though I can't be sure that's entirely accurate. "Nothing" is also his response to "What did you do at school today?")
I thought about telling him the Christian story, just so he knows what it's about and why Christian churches have crosses. But then I paused as I realized that this would involve telling him about a man who was whipped and beaten and then had nails driven through his hands and feet and hung on a cross for several agonizing hours before dying. Sure, I wouldn't go into that much detail, but it's kind of hard to explain the cross without explaining the crucifixion, which is brutal and graphic. My son is very sweet and gentle. I want to preserve that innocence a bit longer.
Nope, I think he's too young to hear about the crucifixion of Christ, just like I think he's too young for Batman or James Bond. Maybe when you're older, son.
If you enjoyed this post, I hope you'll check out my new blog.
We left the LDS church when this boy was about six months old. His exposure to religion since then has been minimal. I dabbled in Protestant churches off and on for a couple of years after leaving Mormonism and would sometimes take my son with me. He's been to churches for some weddings and funerals of extended family members. That's about it. We haven't "pushed" atheism on him (nor do we intend to), but our son is currently non-religious by default.
Last week, we were driving by aforementioned Baptist church when my son--who turns six next month--asked, "What does the 't' mean?"
"That means it's a church," I said.
"But 'church' starts with 'c-h'." Smart, that kid is.
"Well, the 't' is actually a cross and that means it's a Christian church. That means it's for people who believe in Jesus."
"Jesus died in Fargo?"
I couldn't help giggling at this, but I was also curious. We live in a heavily Christian part of the country and my son has Christian friends. I wondered what he may have heard. "What do you know about Jesus?" I asked.
"Nothing," he replied. (Though I can't be sure that's entirely accurate. "Nothing" is also his response to "What did you do at school today?")
I thought about telling him the Christian story, just so he knows what it's about and why Christian churches have crosses. But then I paused as I realized that this would involve telling him about a man who was whipped and beaten and then had nails driven through his hands and feet and hung on a cross for several agonizing hours before dying. Sure, I wouldn't go into that much detail, but it's kind of hard to explain the cross without explaining the crucifixion, which is brutal and graphic. My son is very sweet and gentle. I want to preserve that innocence a bit longer.
Nope, I think he's too young to hear about the crucifixion of Christ, just like I think he's too young for Batman or James Bond. Maybe when you're older, son.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
TED Talk Tuesday: Eve Ensler: happiness in body and soul
The creator of the Vagina Monologues shares where the project took her, what she learned about women's experiences, finding happiness in spite of all the suffering in the world, and gave me a newfound appreciation of vanilla ice cream.
If you enjoyed this post, I hope you'll check out my new blog.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
TED Talk Tuesday: Kavita Ramdas: Radical women, embracing tradition
Can women work within oppressive cultures and use traditions to their advantage? The Feminist Mormon Housewives blog has challenged my thinking on this topic, as did Kavita Ramadas's talk. I can't say I agree 100%, but I appreciated being able to look at the world through someone else's lenses.
If you enjoyed this post, I hope you'll check out my new blog.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Fundamentalism
A poem by Naomi Shihab Nye, courtesy of The Poetry Foundation
If you enjoyed this post, I hope you'll check out my new blog.
Fundamentalism
Because the eye has a short shadow or
it is hard to see over heads in the crowd?
If everyone else seems smarter
but you need your own secret?
If mystery was never your friend?
If one way could satisfy
the infinite heart of the heavens?
If you liked the king on his golden throne
more than the villagers carrying baskets of lemons?
If you wanted to be sure
his guards would admit you to the party?
The boy with the broken pencil
scrapes his little knife against the lead
turning and turning it as a point
emerges from the wood again
If he would believe his life is like that
he would not follow his father into war
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Centered in oneself versus centered on oneself
There was a bit of a kerfuffle in the comments following this post, where I answered some questions from a Mormon believer, stirred by this passage:
To me "self-centered" and "centered on oneself" imply selfishness and egotism, which I don't think are paths to happiness. Perhaps "grounded" or "rooted" in oneself would have been better word choices than "centered." I appreciated the following comment from Andrew S:
I think we all have an instinctive inner voice that can guide us toward a fulfilling life. The religion I grew up in taught me to override this voice if it conflicted with external authority. Some examples:
"Hmm, I'm not really sure how it's not racist to say that the Lamanites were cursed with a skin of blackness for their wickedness (2 Nephi 5: 21-23) and then when they repented their skin became white again (3 Nephi 2:12-15), but my seminary teacher says that the dark skin was a mark, not a curse, so I guess that means it's okay and we're not really a racist church after all."
"I don't understand why God would make me smarter than all these boys in my high school physics class if he just wants me to stay home and have babies, but the prophet says I'm not supposed to have a career, so I guess I'll try to stop wanting to be a scientist."
"I'm a worthless, horrible person because I masturbate, and that means I'm almost as bad as a murderer, because sexual sins are second only to the shedding of innocent blood."
"I'm not really comfortable opposing gay marriage, but my church says I'm supposed to, so I guess I should."
Or one of my favorites, I remember not understanding the appeal of the Mormon belief that we can attain exaltation and become like God. I didn't think I really wanted to be a God. Why would I want that? I mentioned this concern to my bishop at the time. His response: If I were more righteous, my desires would fall into line with what my Heavenly Father had planned for me. The underlying message: God (as represented by his appointed mouthpieces on earth) knows what's best for you; you don't. So just be quiet nice and do what you're told follow our loving counsel.
It's taken me many years to relearn to listen to my own inner guidance system and to feel okay about letting myself want what I naturally want, instead of what I've been told I should want. But every time I take a step toward aligning my life with my own innate desires instead of others' expectations, I feel more at peace and more fulfilled.
Plumbing the inner recesses of your life to discover who you really are and what you really want takes time and work. Writing and journaling are useful tools for me, as well as quiet, solitude, music, meditation. These are things that help me stay grounded, centered, rooted in myself. You have the right to be your own authority on what's best for you. Others can offer perspective, but you should have the final say.
That's what I meant by being centered in oneself.
If you enjoyed this post, I hope you'll check out my new blog.
"I think being centered in oneself, following one's own innate desires and motivations (without infringing on the rights of others, of course) is a more sure path to happiness [than ceding one's autonomy to a God and/or religion]."Some confusion ensued when Patrik asked if it was a consensus among atheists that being centered on oneself was a path to happiness. I don't think Patrik was intentionally playing a semantics game (as he pointed out in a succeeding comment alluding the the dictionary definition of "self-centered"); I think he glossed over my intended meaning and perhaps that's partly my fault.
To me "self-centered" and "centered on oneself" imply selfishness and egotism, which I don't think are paths to happiness. Perhaps "grounded" or "rooted" in oneself would have been better word choices than "centered." I appreciated the following comment from Andrew S:
"I can't speak for everyone (or perhaps, not for anyone more than myself), but I think the idea is that it's better to be yourself and be attuned with and to yourself, rather than to consider yourself an enemy and therefore reject, repress, or suppress yourself whenever something or someone says you should (especially in the name of God)."That's closer to what I was trying to say. I'll try to clarify further.
I think we all have an instinctive inner voice that can guide us toward a fulfilling life. The religion I grew up in taught me to override this voice if it conflicted with external authority. Some examples:
"Hmm, I'm not really sure how it's not racist to say that the Lamanites were cursed with a skin of blackness for their wickedness (2 Nephi 5: 21-23) and then when they repented their skin became white again (3 Nephi 2:12-15), but my seminary teacher says that the dark skin was a mark, not a curse, so I guess that means it's okay and we're not really a racist church after all."
"I don't understand why God would make me smarter than all these boys in my high school physics class if he just wants me to stay home and have babies, but the prophet says I'm not supposed to have a career, so I guess I'll try to stop wanting to be a scientist."
"I'm a worthless, horrible person because I masturbate, and that means I'm almost as bad as a murderer, because sexual sins are second only to the shedding of innocent blood."
"I'm not really comfortable opposing gay marriage, but my church says I'm supposed to, so I guess I should."
Or one of my favorites, I remember not understanding the appeal of the Mormon belief that we can attain exaltation and become like God. I didn't think I really wanted to be a God. Why would I want that? I mentioned this concern to my bishop at the time. His response: If I were more righteous, my desires would fall into line with what my Heavenly Father had planned for me. The underlying message: God (as represented by his appointed mouthpieces on earth) knows what's best for you; you don't. So just be quiet nice and do what you're told follow our loving counsel.
It's taken me many years to relearn to listen to my own inner guidance system and to feel okay about letting myself want what I naturally want, instead of what I've been told I should want. But every time I take a step toward aligning my life with my own innate desires instead of others' expectations, I feel more at peace and more fulfilled.
Plumbing the inner recesses of your life to discover who you really are and what you really want takes time and work. Writing and journaling are useful tools for me, as well as quiet, solitude, music, meditation. These are things that help me stay grounded, centered, rooted in myself. You have the right to be your own authority on what's best for you. Others can offer perspective, but you should have the final say.
That's what I meant by being centered in oneself.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
TED Talk Tuesday: Jane Goodall helps humans and animals live together.
In honor of Earth Week, I'm featuring one of my heroines, the incomparable Jane Goodall. In this talk she discusses her research and her conservation work. In contrast to the belief I grew up with, that man is unique and has God-given dominion over all other life on earth, she says, "There is no sharp line between humans and the rest of the animal kingdom. It's a very blurry line and it's getting more blurry all the time as we make even more observations."
She also discusses the difficulties faced by people in the developing world, and what we can do to help. Microloans and education, especially for women, are some of the most effective means of empowering these people. I would encourage you to support programs such as Kiva and Women for Women International. Jane's memoir Reason for Hope
inspired me to make dozens of changes in my everyday life for the sake of our planet. Recycle. Take the bus. Reduce the amount of meat in your diet. It makes a difference. Our planet is so beautiful, and she's the only home we have. Please let's take good care of her.
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